Doodling while not listening to the lecturer
Last semester was hard than expected, but my grades were still impressive. After a nice and long holiday I was ready to pummel this last semester so I can finally start studying one topic I have interest in. But for some odd reason I have not been able to stay focused. As if I’ve lost all motivation. Even find it difficult to care if I risk having to re-sit an exam.
Old memories are catching up with me. I remember why I never liked school and why I’ve always preferred to be my own teacher.
Some of our teachers go one and on about the importance of being objective, always avoid personal opinion and only rely on verified sources. Although you will only get high marks if you share their views on how to interpret a source or have an opinion if they agree with you.
Bollocks!
I’ve had far too many experiences where their “objectivity” is either based on their personal bias or based on what they’ve been taught to unquestionably teach. No wonder so many fall behind because they think they are dumb. I’m confident that a lot of kids get poor grades because they don’t share their teacher’s opinion. Not that they are being difficult little shits, but because they actually have a greater understand of how things are and work. But because the teacher is the authority at school, they decide if you are “smart” or “dumb” — according to Western bureaucracy.
Not to mention I’ve reached the point where I’m absolutely bored in class. Nothing interests me. Therefore I lose interest. I need to be stimulated mentally. This is a weakness of mine — being an INTJ. I expect the person who is trying to educate me to be equally intelligent and/or experience, or preferably more. If I sense they have a lesser understanding of a topic, I have no confidence in them teaching me what is correct.
All I can do is game the system. Just give the answer which is expected of me and hope they don’t catch me.
They never do.
End of 2015 I might have a university degree, but I will always quote Mark Twain:
Never let your schooling interfere with your education.
I’m confident I was born 60+ years too early. I was meant to be born during a time you could work yourself up from the bottom, without having to first have at least a bachelor degree. We have lost faith in the self-made (wo)man.
